Today I want to talk about the notion of using one’s own judgment or common sense. I’ll start out by saying that I don’t want to sound condescending or simplistic, although I know this may sound very simplistic to you at this point please stick with me. I think if you provide me with a little bit more of a chance to explain it will make more sense.
To begin, many people that visit my site ask the question: “Why should I listen to you?”
Now I could go into a spiel indicating that this is an area I’m very passionate about, it’s my life long passion, I have a studied these matters in university, etc. but you don’t care about that and the truth is it’s not really relevant anyway. What’s really relevant or salient here is that I need to agree with you – you’re right: That is, why should you listen to me or anyone for that matter on a certain level?
Take a look at this suggestion and I think you’ll see where I’m headed.
The next time you have a question in which you’d normally go to someone else to get the answer, try asking yourself the question as if you are the expert or person you’re usually going to for the answer to this type of question.
Example: Let’s say you’re having trouble with your oven. You could go to the manual, internet, or ask yourself the question: How can I operate the oven in this manner,
By asking yourself the question first you’re not giving away your own ability to answer the question and you’re not being passive.
Now I’m sure again that this sounds simplistic or ridiculous to many of you intelligent folks out there. Many people will say that’s it faster and more efficient to ask someone else. I would respond that this is very often the case with someone in their professional life. But in one’s home life – and I think this applies to many people – let’s say one is watching the news or other media source, he/she becomes passive and doesn’t question things.
In a sense people doing this are giving away their own power or more specifically giving someone or something else the ultimate power or expert status. The blinders are put on or the radar may be turned off. Perhaps this doesn’t apply to everyone but it does to many on certain levels.
The whole self-help industry in some respects has many times been more geared towards elevating so called experts ahead of the individual’s common sense across a couple of topics. Many people will state that what the person (expert) says makes perfect sense. Well of course it does and you likely could have come up with the same thing if you had of deferred to yourself. The notions one sees in self-help have been around for years but the person is open to the information – which is exactly what can happen when you get back into the habit of using your judgment in these areas.
Now I’m not saying that you shouldn’t ever listen to other people or other sources. But what I am saying is that you should keep using your judgment at all times; another way of expressing it: don’t remain passive.
Let’s look at a scenario that many face (the exact scenario may vary slightly but the overall fundamental doesn’t). I think mostly everyone does have their blinders on more than they think.
It could be that you get home from work, you’re tired, you turn on the news and you say to yourself that it’s probably true. You don’t question it and simply take it as true. In reality news can be biased, might only provide some aspects of the story etc. This of course isn’t restricted to news but virtually can extend to all areas of one’s life.
I want to discuss another example of a person who works for me. She often defers to me for answers on a variety of things because she feels I may have them right on hand. The answers can be found if she consults various other sources that at her fingertips but she is in the habit of passing over her judgment in situations to someone else (that someone else is me in this situation).
What I do to this person – which unfortunately annoys her although that’s not my intention – is refer her back to the sources of answers besides myself and also ask her to think her question through. Often what happens is she finds the answer or discovers she already had it. What she has learned to do is pass over her power to someone else when she was perfectly capable of coming up with the answers. I did the same thing when I entered the work force, partly because I was new, but I improved because I think I had a good boss at the time who pushed me a little further to use my own judgment or exhaust all sources of information before coming to her.
Given all the news stories and other information you’re bombarded with on a daily basis, and given that the news stories may not present all sides of the story [because in reality there are many sides to a story (more about this in the next installment where we build on things)] the effect can be detrimental to our own state of being informed or empowered.
Often when you read a story it may only present one or two sides. Certain assumptions may form the foundation of the news item. By becoming more accustomed to using your judgment in situations like these and in all situations, you’ll be heading towards the road of being informed and empowered.
Thank you for reading this.
- Matthew